Half a Thought: by Jon

It’s 11:23pm, and after several false-starts on this blog post, I have decided to throw caution to the wind and get as much down on paper as possible, coherent or not.

… on screen, I guess.

Not important.

Anyway,

The funniest thing I read on Wikipedia this week was about the “Yuppie Nuremburg Defense.” As you might know, the “Nuremburg Defense” was utilized (unsuccessfully) by defendants during the Nuremburg Trials, who stated that they committed their crimes because they were only following orders. The “Yuppie Nuremburg Defense,” as referenced in the novel/film adaptation of Thank You for Smoking, states, “it pays the mortgage.”

(I suppose the corollary to this might be the Maxim Defense – according to Maxim magazine, until the age of 30, a man can defend any action by uttering the words, “Dude, I was sooooooooo drunk!” After the age of 30, a man can defend his actions by uttering the words, “Hey, I pay my taxes!”)

Anyway, I never saw myself becoming a Yuppie. As my sister so lovingly puts it, I “used to make a career out of fighting The Man, and now I am The Man.” But one day, I woke up, and realized that I was living in a yuppie neighbourhood, driving my yuppie car to work, high gas prices and environmental impact be damned. I order takeout instead of cooking, I buy toys that I don’t need, and I cheerfully start far too many sentences with, “I was reading the Globe and Mail today, and…” I stopped paying attention for a few years, and when I clued back in, I had become everything I used to mock.

Then I realized that I’m closer to 30 than I am to 20. Ouch. Maybe there’s no turning back. I probably shouldn’t throw away my career and pension to go chasing my 18-year old self’s dream of becoming a famous jazz musician, because in the end, the risk might outweigh the payoff.

Then again, maybe I could take high-school Algebra and Geometry, and apply to Queen’s again, but this time as an engineer. Just to see if I could do it. What’s the harm in trying?

I’m in my mid-20s, finished my education, and am just embarking on what I hope will be a great career. But it’s not my dream. So here’s my question:

Do I still believe that, fundamentally, you can achieve anything that you put your mind to? Or will there always be insurmountable obstacles, depending on where your personal circumstances in this life?

I have to think about this one some more.

Anyway, I’d write more tonight, but I have to get up at 5:45am tomorrow. It’s a tough schedule, but I guess it pays the mortgage.

This is Zero-Echo-Niner, over and out.